Natural Hair Styles That Do Not Work For Me

Thanks BGLH for the inspiration as usual...although I have been wanting to film a video about this for quite a while. There are a few natural hairstyles that don't work for me and I'm sure some of you can relate.

1. Twistouts
They look so good on others but my twists unravel UNLESS I use perm rods. I can never do them the right size anyway :(

2. Perm rod sets
Only on a section of hair 
Otherwise...



3. Mini twists.
See no.1 and also I get halfway and I think I'm never going to finish lol

Hairstyles that do work for me:

Braidouts

Bantu knot outs
Puffs (my saviour!)

Buns (loveee)
French braids/flat twists

Top Tip : T Shirt Drying

Recently after shampoo washing my hair I have been using a t-shirt to wrap my hair in order to dry it. I generally always air dry my hair (I've blow dried 3 times since I big chopped). Instead of using a towel I use a t-shirt (after applying my leave-in) until my hair is about 60% damp and then I braid in order to stretch my hair.

Click here to read about the benefits of t-shirt drying

Natural Hair Talk #4 Natural Hair Celebrities are they an issue or a help to the natural hair community?

I know it has been a long long time since I have posted any of these- but no issues really arose lol. This has just been something I have been thinking about recently since Nicki Minaj posted this picture on her Instagram:

She has previously posted a picture of her natural hair. As has Blac Chyna (rapper Tyga's girlfriend):

So has Vanessa Simmons:

NOW you know I do wear weave especially during the Winter (October-March/April) I stay weaved up because: I want to protect my hair during the cold months, it's COLD, I like to change my hairstyle, it's COLD and it does provide some ease for me during these months and it's COLD.

Back to the debate, in my opinion the main comments surrounding these pictures were as follows:
1) "They're mixed that's why they have long hair" OR "That's fake"

Pssh...we all know black women can grow long hair (which is kind of why I am surprised that people are so shocked at any of the pictures above)

2) Well they cover it up with weave anyway. What is the point in showing it off and covering it back up again? Never wearing their natural hair out just encourages the idea that straight hair is best.

Ignoring no.1.

Number two is interesting to me. At the end of the day, they are deemed as celebrities so I don't really blame them for wearing their hair straight or in a weave. It could be that the stylists are not able to work with natural hair (not making an excuse but it may be). Or that they wish to change up their style often and do not want to damage or colour their own natural hair. Or *sighs* it could be that it is 'easier' to deal with. It is strange, but I do think if they did wear their hair out (actually out the door at an event) young black women could be influenced to wear their natural hair more or think positively about it. Perhaps the fact they are covering it up could be influencing others to cover theirs up too. Look how many followers they have on Instagram- the power they hold over (some) people's thoughts and perceptions is huge! However we still have Solange, Erykah Badu, Marsha Ambrosius, Luptita Nyong'o annnd has it made much of a difference? But than on the other hand they are the minority NOT the majority. Maybe if more black women wore their natural hair out it would be seen as a norm rather than an other.

Is it fair that they should be passed (some of) the responsibility over young women wearing their natural hair or being proud of it? To be honest, the responsibility probably lies with the mothers of young women providing encouragement and advice and information.

Images from:

theobsessie.blogspot.com 

necolebitchie.com 

iheartsoutheuclid.blogspot.com 

rollingout.com -

Natural Hair Talk #3 Is Relaxing a Child's Hair Equivalent to Child Abuse?

I saw this picture on Instagram and HAD to answer it. I thought it was a really good question. I personally would not reccommend relaxing a child's hair. In fact I loved one person's parent's answer to whether they could have a relaxer as a child, "You can have a relaxer when you can pay for it with your own money". Basically they can pay for it when they are old enough to have a full time job, usually 16-18 years old. I wanted that Tia and Tamera hair so I got my first relaxer at 9:

It didn't do anything but make my edges curly (I have type 4 hair). When I was 10 I got my first proper curly perm at the hairdressers (kinda like this lol):

I liked it, but the new growth was horrible. My mum didn't really know what to do with my hair as a child, she could braid but not cainrow. Even now, my mum will not "deal" with her natural hair despite my encouragement to do so. She has gorgeous type 3c/4a hair and could even do wash and goes but refuses to.
This brings me to the question do I think relaxing a child's hair is child abuse? No. In my opinion child abuse involves acts of deliberately hurting a child whether physically, verbally or psychologically. Examples include: hurtful name calling, over feeding, under feeding, bullying, beating etc. That is child abuse. Relaxing a child's hair is not child abuse because often it is done not out of a hurtful intention but because the parent does not know any other way of caring for it. It is a last resort.

I suppose if the relaxer was painful it could be categorised as child abuse. But I do not think the intention is to hurt the child. It is usually due to lack of haircare knowledge.

Do I think relaxing a child's hair is wrong? Yes. Because the child is not old enough to give permission for this (albeit temporary) change to their outward appearance. Those are my thoughts. Hope you enjoyed reading, feel free to share your thoughts!

Images from officialtiamowry.com and vetschoice.wordpress.com

Natural Hair Talk #2 Is Defined Hair best?

I was inspired to create this response due to this article about a woman who thought her hair had to be defined to 
look 'presentable'. It made me sad and it hinted at an ideal that defined type 3a/b/c hair is presentable whereas
type 4a/b/c is 'difficult'.
Personally I choose to wear stretched styles to work because:

That is, I do not always have time to flat twist or braid or bantu knot my hair nightly and undo in the mornings during
the week. However weekends and the odd Thursday night I do. There isn't even a debate as to whether type 4 hair
is presentable. If you think not...

I have many tutorials on this blog and Youtube if you don't believe me. One thing I was confused about when 
transitioning was the obsession with curl definition. For example, Instagram. Post a stretched afro= 10 likes, a
bomb braidout = 300 likes. What'supwiththat. I thought being natural was a transition (pun intended) out of the
mindset that one hair texture is better than another. Hey, ho. And if you wanted a quick summary of my thoughts,
read this lovely reply:

Images from: www.hotelfashionland.com, www.brownskin.fr , vantol777.deviantart.com 

Natural Hair Talk #1: Does wearing weave equal self-hatred?

I really wanted to post my opinion on different natural hair issues and this was one that cropped up recently. I plan to post these monthly or every other month...depending how it goes.

This question was asked on Instagram and Twitter both were asked by two black males. So I thought I would provide my answer:

The main reasons (in no particular order) women wear weaves are because:

a) It is easier than having to care for their natural hair

b) They like the versatility of different hairstyles

c) They think it makes them more attractive

d) As a protective style to improve hair growth retention

e) They want to *shrugs*

I have worn weaves on and off since the age of 19. I originally got a weave because my friends chose to so I did to. Back then I did like the ability to swang my hair back and forth! I also liked the ability to have long 18inch hair then a 10 inch bob with a bang then long hair again. I did not continually wear weaves sometimes I would wear braids too. But I would NEVER wear my natural hair, the only time I saw my natural hair between 19 and 22 years old was when I saw my reflection in the mirror when I took my weave down lol. Yes I hold my hands up in shame I know better now *hallejuiah*

 Fast forward to the present and the weave game is serious. Competitive. One weave bundle could set you back as much as £100+ (no I haven't paid that much). You now have Peruvian, Chinese, Malaysian, Brazilian, Russian, Indian and even Native American. So why do I still wear weave?

Well firstly, I just want to clarify black women are not the only race to wear weaves, no no no the Kardashian sisters do as well *shock horror*. 

As well as many English celebrities who choose to add extra wefts whether sewn in or clipped in. Back to the matter...I wear weave because of reasons B, D and E. Let me explain:

B) I like having different hairstyles. I get bored. I haven't worn weave or a wig on a daily basis since March and I have been rocking my natural hair everyday. I rarely wear the same natural hair hairstyle two days in a row. I have a serious hair decision making disorder - yes I made it up. On the weekends, if I want to wear a huge afro kinky curly wig and then a wig with a bang then a wig and then an afro puff- who gon stop me? Which brings me onto E). One of the BEST things about going natural is the increase in confidence I have. People stare sometimes (hey my type 4 hair can produce a huuuge puff) and probably think !why am I wearing it? Where is my weave and why do I think it looks good?" My head, my hair. Simple. Ain'tnobodygottime to spend worrying about people think, okaay!

Finally D)- weave for me has seriously helped me with my natural hair growth. Do you know how hard it was transitioning for 11 months and handling bone straight ends and type 4 roots? Girrrll. So I am so happy I had my wig to help me through! And yes, I love my wigs/weave in the Winter this enables me to protect my natural hair from the cold and snow. 

I can't speak for all women. But please don't judge a book by its cover. Not ALL women wear weaves because of self hatred. SMH. I repeat- I have not worn a weave or a wig to work since MARCH. Funnily enough when I stated I wear natural hair AND weave to one of the males who stated black females wear weave to be white. I got no reply. I guess we can't all handle it when someone proves you wrong *shrugs* ;)

Images from Celebritypop.com and aliexpress, rapgenuis.com, weddingbycolor.com, rollingout.com